Not for Human Consumption!

On our coffee table we have the usual things.  There are a few large books that nobody every picks up let alone reads, an antique looking wooden box, a matching letter opener and magnifying glass with carved ivory handles, a large white bowl with a blue, Asian looking picture of a dragon, a stack of coasters, the television remote and a square, turquoise dish that is full of little red, dried, berry-looking things that smell like red-hots and are designed to make the room smell nice.  

As for the last coffee table item I mentioned, I don’t think I’ve ever mistaken potpourri for actual food.  Sure, I’ve joked around at friends’ houses and acted like I was either eating, or going to eat something odd from their potpourri bowl just to get a laugh, but what self-respecting teenage guy hasn’t done that at least a dozen times?  

However, last night Don, my father-in-law, came over just to hang out and spend time with the family.  He’s sitting on the sofa and we’re talking about the economy, President Obama’s first few days in office and other chitchat stuff when, in mid sentence, he reaches down and grabs about a half handful of the dried berry-looking things.  I don’t think I really understood what he was going to do, because before I can say anything he pops a few in his mouth! 

I’m sitting there in kind of a stunned disbelief as the chewing begins, and his face starts to distort.  Melissa comes back from the kitchen just in time to hear him say, “Man! These are really strong!”  

To which she replies, “They should be, it’s potpourri, but not supposed to be eaten.”  

At which point, I burst out laughing.  

So now, if you come to our house, our coffee table will have all of the above-mentioned items, PLUS, a tiny, strategically place sign that reads, 

“Not for Human Consumption!”