Really Cool Stuff I Know I'll Never Have...

I'm sorry about the quality of these pictures, but I don't have a scanner, so I had to use my camera.


Every time I fly somewhere I always look forward to thumbing through the latest edition of Sky Mall magazine. I guess I'm far to easily mesmerized by this kind of thing, but come on...there are literally hundreds of gadgets in there that would be so much fun to have and would make life SO much easier.

Take a look at a few of the things I'm talking about and maybe you’ll understand.


Here we have the world’s largest crossword puzzle. As you can see, it is in fact so large that it doubles as a tapestry. At first I thought, “Man, that would be cool!” However, if you combine how bad as I am at crossword puzzles, with how quickly I get bored with this kind of thing, what you get is an unbelievably useless and ridiculously ugly piece of faux-art hanging on the wall that costs $29.95.


Then we have the battery storage center that holds up to 53 batteries, complete with a high-tech battery tester that tests bulbs and fuses too! I must admit, I almost ordered this bad boy. I mean it’s only $14.95 and it holds 53 batteries! But really, do you need a battery operated tester to tell if a bulb does not work?


And what about a remote control Beverage Buggy. This little guy holds not one, but two 12-ounce cans or two 16-ounce bottles of your favorite beverage. I can just picture it, I’m watching TV and I run out of my favorite beverage. Luckily I have my Beverage Buddy. Assuming I can navigate the buggy around the multiple blind corners and actually get him into the kitchen, an assistant needs to not only be there, but be ready and willing to help. Not to mention the fact that he or she must also be clairvoyant enough to know what I want.
For $49.95 it’s a true steal.


What could be better after a long day of traveling that you very own portable, inflatable whirlpool spa? It holds 250 gallons of water (not included) and costs a mere $899.95.
I don’t know what else to say.


Now these next two I really do like. Not enough to actually order them, but enough to seriously consider thinking about the possibility of maybe looking for them at an actual store.


First, we have the six-device electronics charger. For $99.95, who couldn’t and wouldn't use that on a daily basis? Help me out. I an identify the phone, the I-POD, the camera and maybe a PDA, but what are those two small things?


Next up, is the Squid power strip. I confess, I have had problems plugging in more that two or three of those large cube shaped, device power cords into my surge protector. However, $54.95 would solve that problem in a hurry!


If you’re a true Star Wars fan then your life isn’t complete without your very own voice-activated R2-D2. He may only be 15 inches tall, but he responds to over 40 voice commands. If you could teach him to take your favorite beverage out of the fridge and put the bottles (or cans) into your Beverage Buddy, well then he’d be well worth $119.95.


And last, but not least, is the Programmable Beverage Mixer. Never again will you be forced to live without your favorite frozen beverage. Whether you like Margaritas, Pina-Coladas or Slurpees this $379.00 machine is all you need. It's fully programmable...whatever that means. Hey! I could give a voice command to R2-D2 that makes him mix the drinks in the Programmable Beverage Mixer and then load them into the Beverage Buddy!
Now we're cooking!

Sure there were other things like the $129.95 fake houseplant/cat box, the $39.00 Batagang money clip, or the $129.95 gutter-cleaning robot that were each very tempting, but it was getting late and I was getting tired of taking pictures of a magazine.

Next time you fly do yourself a favor and check out Sky Mall magazine. If you do you’ll get to see a bunch of really cool stuff that I’ll never have.