I was watching myself sleepily drag my brush through my hair in the mirror a few days ago when it occurred to me that I only ever see myself backwards.
Then I realized that the only way anyone ever sees himself or herself is in a mirror and that means backwards. Oh sure, I’ve seen myself in photographs and videos, but to be perfectly honest, I never look like I think I should. Quite possibly my dissatisfaction with my appearance in pictures may have something to do with the fact that to me the image is flipped.
And what about all those other people who hate having their picture taken? You know the ones. They’re always sticking their hands in front of their faces and yelling obscenities at the photographer. (Well, perhaps not all of them use obscenities, but you get the point) Maybe, they just don’t like seeing themselves backwards either!
Standing there half asleep, with my brain trying to soak this in, I start wondering about other things that look backwards to me. First, my hair is really parted on the other side. Next, my ring is really on the other hand. The little scar on my face is really on the other side. And the list goes on and on and on.
Then I began to wonder. Who’s really seeing backwards? Am I getting a backwards view of reality, or is reality getting a backwards view of me? Maybe my hair really is parted on the side I think it is, but you just can’t see it correctly.
That’s when I started to get worried. I mean what if it’s more than just the physical things about me other people are seeing in reverse.
Could it be that my whole world is backwards from reality?
Come to think of it, there have been times when I have deemed things to be funny, or cool, or stupid that other people have either failed to see the humor in, or simply considered to be no big deal, or thought they made perfect sense.
In these situations, who was right and who was backwards? Even as I’m writing that last sentence I’m forced to wonder, why can’t backwards be right?
Years ago I had a dyslexic child in my class about whom the district’s diagnostician said, “This child has the most sever case of dyslexia I have seen in 25 years of testing.” Bob didn’t know right from left, up from down or front from back. This poor guy didn’t know if he was coming or going.
With my new everything’s backwards quandary, I found myself thinking about Bob. I had to laugh when I thought about Bob in front of a mirror. I bet mirrors were Bob’s greatest fear.
But maybe, just maybe, they were his greatest joy. Maybe, for Bob, everything he saw in the mirror made perfect sense. Maybe he could do that “try to trace the star while looking in the mirror” thing better than anyone. Not because he saw things different, but because he saw them way they were really meant to be. For a brief moment, I started to envy Bob. However unlikely, there is a chance that he not only sees things differently, but maybe he sees them the way the way God intended. Who knows?
And there you have it, my backwards epiphany.
So what does this backwards epiphany mean? Your guess is as good as mine. I’m just writing things for you to read…
Or maybe you’re just reading things for me to write...
